Home Run Life-Rounding 3rd Base on the Way for a Home Run!

If Winning isn’t everything, then why do they keep score?” – Vince Lombardi

As we round the corner at third base, the focus shifts to growing results. Every play of the game thus far has included growth. At home plate, it was growth in our spiritual relationship. First base was growth in our character. As you arrive at the third base, it is time to shift the eyes on growing and winning results.

This feels so natural for us, right? After all, we know that improving results at work means promotions, more money, and more respect. Winning results with our health might look like lost pounds, reduced pain, increased strength, more energy and so on. We are results driven world and time are of the essence. We hustle at work, home, and school. We think about goals and efficiency in a way that will take us to the next level.

Have you ever assumed you had it all planned out only for the universe to send you a curve ball? Remember how down straighten you were. What about looking back and thinking I would never have imagined it would end up like this. Sometimes we get in a hurry! We easily become impatient if the outcome isn’t instant. Maybe you feel a calling to do something the opportunities haven’t arrived yet. You desire to restore relationships and things seem to be worse. Despite your best efforts and hard work things just aren’t working out in life. It is time for a reality check: Will you give up on the process or grow up into a productive person? I admit I thought if I worked hard and was a respectable citizen thing would be to harvest, harvest, harvest. When to my surprise I’ve learned that life is plow, plant, harvest, plow, plant, no crop, plow, plant, harvest.

Have you ever felt this impatience with your health? It starts with a little fatigue, a twinge here, a pinch here, hmmm I can not tie my shoes and so on. You may even start to skimp on your self-care. Before you know it, you are down the rabbit hole, and you are stuck with now results of growth in sight. We can get on the path to productivity and results again you have to be committed to real growth that’s not wrapped up in worldly measurements or super-fast timing. We need growth that results in growing the self-care support system.

“Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my tree.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

Home Plate – Connection with Spirit
First Base– Character Winning Within Self
Second Base– Community Winning with Others
Third Base: Competence Winning with Results

Are you living the home run life?
Everything starts and ends with our connection to self and our desire to grow.
How are you living these days? The empty life, the unfulfilled life, the frustrating life, the fulfilling life
What is it going to take to move from home plate to first base? Effort and Commitment to Connection, Character, Community, and Competence.

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Home Run Life – 2nd Base!

“I love mankind, it is people I can’t stand.” Linus, Peanuts

 

Have you ever heard the tongue and check statements like “People Suck!,” “Life would be better with fewer people,” “I’d love my job if it weren’t for people,” I want to go somewhere that doesn’t have people.” Yet if you do a google search what turns up:

  • “Winning Others Over,”
  • “How to win managing people,”
  • “How to make connections with others,”
  • 25 ways to this, 6 ways to that, top 10 lists,
  • Tweets, blogs, books, workshops

and so on there are infinite enter i.e. show that all have one thing in common “PEOPLE!”

 

What are some of your best moments? For me it was doing:

  • 4-H, walking again,
  • graduating with my bachelors,
  • having my niece and nephew born,
  • my wedding,
  • opening my business,
  • finding my passion and purpose in life,
  • running again and doing multiple half-marathons without chronic pain,
  • interning at John Hopkins Hospital,
  • graduating from grad school,
  • and all of the memories I create with family and friends.

What have you gone through that carries disappointment or sorrow? For me it was:

  • being in a hospital bed for a year,
  • being sexually assaulted at a party,
  • having an eating disorder,
  • being physically and emotionally abused by a loved one,
  • losing my first job,
  • struggles in my marriage,
  • the death of grandparents and friends,
  • and watching my parents deteriorate before my eyes,
  • betrayal,
  • employees that abandon clients and the philosophy I live by.

What is one thing all of these items have in common? PEOPLE! Life’s worst of times and best of times, however, life involves people and the beautiful messy encounters, and that’s why the second base is a part of the game. You know I wouldn’t change any of it because the mess allows me to reconstruct and grow and the best of times allows me to enjoy the sweetness of life. Either way the dice rolls I live in gratitude for all of it.

 

People are our base of our community. Unless you can tell me how this whole Earth and Universe was made beautiful, powerful, healing and alive with everything we need- you have to believe in God or a higher power whatever that is for you. We are imperfect beautifully perfect beings all working on issues, all hurt in some way, all perfect, and the set of unique gifts that we need to thrive. It is how we deal with them that determines our success or sorrow. It first begins at home plate our relationship with spirit. Once we are connected to that and develop our character we move onto the second base where the key is an attitude of humility and willingness to change and grow. We either have healthy or unhealthy relationships. So how do you intentionally build healthy ones?

 

Second base is where we get to put into practice everything we’ve learned at home plate. The beauty is that it is not for our gain, but we do it for others. Why is this so important? Caring about others, pursuing healthy relationships, being more loving and giving, even forgiveness are all part of being successful at second base. Maybe we could change our attitude from “people suck” to “without people, what kind of life would it be?” Boring that is for sure!

 

“Winning at second base begins with admitting that we are all imperfect people who have some emotional wounds that need to be healed.” – Kevin Myers

 

Those of you who follow my work know that I’m a big fan of non-violent communication (NVC) developed by Marshall Rosenberg. Well, one of my favorite yogi’s wrote a book called What We Say Matters: Practicing Nonviolent Communication by Judith Hanson Laster and Ike Laster. She talks about listening to ourselves and others. She uses an example of how to hear yourself in a new way, and that is to understand whatever someone else says to you as a request. So you can translate whatever somebody says to you as a “please” or “thank you.” Here is an example Judith shares in her book and I know I have done this and you probably have too. Have you ever not timed the light exactly right and you end up in the cross walk. Has someone who is using the cross walk ever looked at you in disgust or yelled “stupid driver.” Then you beat yourself up with inner dialogue filled with judgments and shame or maybe you thought that the individual in the cross walk was being rude and blame them. Instead, if you translate that into “please hear my fear” “please understand I was afraid you might hit someone.” Do you feel compassion arise for him and yourself? Next time someone says something that irritates you translate it into a “please” or “thank you” even better you may go back to someone the next day and say “What I meant to say the other day is…..Please hear…..” Note their response and how you feel in your body and mind. You can determine which way leaves you feeling empowered and empathic.

 

When I first heard the phrase “hurting people hurt people” in my mid-twenties I realized that I had been hurting people do to childhood traumas that I suffered. I learned to look at the flip side of the coin and that without addressing my issues I could not expect to have healthy relationships with others. So I started on a path of introspection, self-study, and to make a conscious choice of the person I wanted to become. Have you ever seen a family where the parents are very successful, yet the kids are not? The parent’s greed and pride, which they passed onto their children created broken relationships. This elephant in the room continues to stay affecting for years until the elephant is talked about such as the greed and pride that was causing so much pain and until that energy is willing to shift to putting each other first, the family cannot heal. The good news is that, although our brokenness may create havoc in our relationships, we are given space and time actually to heal. Time only heals when we spend time healing. When we don’t, it’s the elephant that does all the growing instead of us. I know to write a shitty rough draft in my journal where I sit across the table from them and then write a letter of nonviolent communication after I have given myself self-empathy and I can sit next to the person.

 

How does the phrase “hurting people hurt people” affect you when you first heard it? Why do you think it affected you that way?

 

What are some of your past wounds that time has not healed? Do you think they could heal if you started taking steps to improve them? What might that look like?

 

How can the encouragement of being united in a community of love, kindness, and empathy help you to show love to others? In what ways can you show that love?

 

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The Home Run Life – Home Plate

 

To me, baseball has always been a reflection of life” – Willie Stargell

It is summer and baseball is in full swing. Just as Willie a professional baseball player saw his baseball as a way of life, I too see evidence-based movement such as Yoga and Pilates as a reflection of life.

In the 1989 baseball movie “Field of Dreams”, main character Ray hears a voice telling him the now nearly infamous line, “If you build it, they will come.” Obediently, Ray mows down his cornfield, builds a baseball diamond, and then faces foreclosure on his family’s home – all to make the baseball field. This movie was coming out as I was graduating high school and thinking about what I would become as I contemplated college. Field of Dreams is centered around the all-American game of baseball which captures our imagination, nostalgia and the sense of a journey that we’ve come to expect when baseball is the backdrop. I remember at the time getting a Bachelor’s of Applied Science it wasn’t my first pick but one that would get me a job that paid fairly well, allowed for creativity and was a respectable course load that I could handle as I commuted to school and kept a full-time job to pay for school. Fast forward 20+ years later and I am finishing up my Masters of Science in Yoga Therapy. Who knew that my undergrad was setting me up for this!

Think about the game of baseball no matter what there are a home plate and three bases. You have to start at home and run the bases in order, home to first, first to second, second to third, third to home no exceptions. Failure to run the bases in order will automatically result in an out. When you run all the bases and cross home plate, you score. Your self-care is like this. If you skip the order of bases of caring for your health than at some point you are ejected and forced to connect with yourself and concede to running the bases.

If you are like me, you have a spiritual connection with something higher than yourself. You understand that there has been a particular plan or framework with a deeper meaning and purpose than you could have ever imagined laid out for you in your life. Using this analogy of a baseball diamond helps you see that your personal growth has happened in ways you couldn’t have imagined. You know that you must run and play with self-care to live life to the fullest extent, and just like in baseball you need to move your self-care in the order of the bases.

Here is how I see the bases in Integrative Sustainable Movement (ISM)-

Home Plate – Connection with something higher than yourself, Bhakti the path of devotion to love, kindness and compassion and all actions are done in the context of remembering the divine.

Bhagavad Gita 9.26 “Whoever offers me with devotion a leaf, a flower, fruit or a little water – that, so offered devotedly by the pure-minded, I accept.”

First Base– Connection with your self-care, Jnana the path of knowledge, wisdom, introspection, and contemplation.

Bhagavad Gita 2.55 “When a man puts away all the desires of his mind, …and when his spirit is content in itself, then is he called stable in intelligence.”

Second Base – Connection with your community, selfless service, Karma the path of selfless service, of action, mindfulness, and remembering our actions have an impact on the world.

Bhagavad Gita 2.47 “You have a right to perform your prescribed duty, but you are not entitled to the fruits of action. Never consider yourself the cause of the results of your activities, and never be attached to not doing your duty.”

Third Base– Connection with Mindfulness, Raja the path of a comprehensive method that emphasizes encompassing the whole, encountering and transcending thoughts of the mind. Being able to observe your reactions and choose how you want to respond.

Bhagavad Gita 6.6 “For him who has conquered the mind, the mind is the best of friends; but for one who has failed to do so, his mind will remain the greatest enemy.”

We all have different temperaments, the goal of life is to discover our true nature to connect with our divine nature and using our self-care practice is a way to help us find this truth. Every person possesses and identifies with the intellect, heart, body, and mind. Is it time to check out your local Mind Body Balance Studio to learn about the evidence-based movement?

Kevin Myers once said “Everyone wants to score in life. Everyone intends to be a winner. Most of us want to experience the equivalent of a home run life, a life where our dreams are fulfilled.” Do you have that kind of life? Have you succeeded? How have you decided to play?

The truth is when we want to play the game the way want to play it “ego” the result is often disastrous. We don’t win. We get “called out, ” and we suffer. Or maybe you are like me you do well in one area of your life and strike out in another. Do well in your career and strike out in your marriage, get your finances stable and the family is unstable, build up your reputation for success and your body breaks down in the process, drive to reach your goal and lose your spiritual connection in the process….are you losing your way and running the bases backwards, in hopes that your way will get you across home plate faster.

Is there a way to get a home run in all areas of your life? Can you trust that the Divine has a plan and everything happens in the order that it needs to happen? How can we run the bases and win? It all starts at home plate- up to bat next – is YOU!

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